I take back what I said/posted/thought yesterday. Who on earth am I trying to kid seriously. I hate paddling? Not even close boy. Rather, I love it. And that's precisely why I'm getting all upset and mentally tired. Why bother if I dislike it so bad right? Hahits my own incompetency to be blamed for my angst, not Canoeing. Being unable to do my best/improve/excel is the problem, not the sport. Whatever bubble of evil thoughts dominated my mind sure mindfucked me bad for the past few days. Really glad I've finally sorted out my thinking. Gotta think positive and cast aside all distractions. Forty One Days, thats all I'm left with.


Canoeing has become such a huge part of my life, I'm actually dreading the end of compt (other than for the food and extra time on my hands to spend with the books). Probably might take me awhile to get used to the free afternoons and evenings, just school, home and studying. Sounds mundane and awful already.

I'm really gonna miss having dinner with the canoeing people badly.