I'm sick and tired of trying

I'm really tired of having to try pretend that I even care. It's my fault that I'm keeping a distance. Its my fault I'm so critical and judgmental and I really cant control how I feel. Its my fault that I can be such a superficial bitch, such an effing leech, and so fucking disgusting. I know that all. I dont wana be twofaced anymore, that is so insincere and dishonest I might just die putting up this tiring act for another year or so.

Someone just stab me pleaseeeeee I don't know why and how I've become such a angry person overflowing with critism for others in just a few short months.